Top Ten Signs that Your Partner is a Coach  (a little humour)

1.  They are annoyingly positive all the time

2.  They want to divide every task into small steps

3. They never give a straight answer to the question "What shall I do?"  They twist it around and ask "What options have you?"

4.  They throw away too much clutter

5.  They mutter about tolerations and getting rid of whatever they are

6.  They put me on the spot and ask "when will you do that?"

7.  They are never home for breakfast because they are out networking

8.  They know how to have fun

9.They listen without interrupting

10.They have endless energy and a sparkle in their eye

Have a great holiday season everyone!

Benita

  The Coach Approach 

November 2004

by Benita Stafford-Smith

With the holiday season just around the corner and the year end following shortly, we are entering a very busy time.

Social activities, shopping and decorating all increase dramatically for many in late November and throughout December.  For the self employed or those with budget responsibilities within their companies, December is a time to close out the last quarter, possibly the year end and a time take stock of the year.

I ask you to pause for a moment and reflect on three actions!  Define Focus & Actively Wait

In life and in business we must define what we're doing.  I hear many people saying they want to to be happy and successful but when I ask them to define that for me they often cannot.

Happiness and success mean different things to different people.    Thomas Leonard, founder of the coaching industry, developed an exercise to define success.  he asks us to develop three statements to define success.

I'll know I'm successful when. 1..............

I'll know I'm successful when...2..........

I'll know I'm successful when....3.........

He asks us to take this a little deeper than I'll know I'm successful when I'm happy.  You must be able to define happy further as happy means something different to each of us.

I find this exercise to be very useful.  You can take this exercise and use it many times.  For example:

I'll know 2004 was a year successful year when

                     1.......................................

                      2......................................

                       3......................................

I'll know the Christmas holidays were successful when

                     1...........................................

                       2............................................

                          3...........................................

I'll know 2005 was a successful business year when

                        1..........................................

                          2.........................................

                            3........................................

I invite you to pause and define important areas of your life, both personal and business.

These definitions form a structure within which you can operate.  With definitions at hand I invite you to focus on what is important, distributing your resources wisely.

Life is so much easier when we clearly know what direction we're going.  Focus is very important, offering a pathway to success and allowing us to easily prioritize activities and bypass distractions.

Once we have defined our path and are focused on doing what is necessary to be successful, the next step is to actively wait.  This is a term I often use with my clients - actively wait.  It encompasses doing all you need to do and then waiting for the results.  The main ideas is to stop trying to force success.  Do the work and wait for the results.  At times we can be so desperate we often chase away success.

I'm writing this newsletter on a return trip from Saskatoon.  The analogy of actively waiting applies very nicely to traveling.  If you've traveled with small children you'll know what I mean.  Asking over and over again "when will we be there?" doesn't get you there any faster.  In fact it can make the trip seem a lot longer and can be very frustrating.  Instead sit back and relax, you'll get there when you get there provided you do all that is necessary, that is have directions, sufficient fuel and continue to drive.

Just like traveling I invite you in business and in life to continue to drive and you'll get there.  The journey is as much fun as arriving at the destination!